She Drives Me Crazy!

A month in to the Malcolm-Bell driving experiment and I've come to at least one conclusion, the Bell element is highly volatile.  She's one hell of a backseat driver!

Sarah's already very protective of the kitchen, actually that's not entirely correct.  She's very protective of the hob but couldn't care less about the dirty plates + the sink = washing up equation.  So it shouldn't have been such a surprise to me that when I'm driving, like when I'm cooking, she still wants to be in control of the action.

She fixes an almost constant gaze on the speedometer when we're on the motorway.  If I dare to stray over 70mph I'm berated for going to fast and if I happen to get what she deems to be too close to the car in front, well, the language is enough to make a grown man blush!

As soon as Sarah realised that last Sunday was going to be bright and sunny she started on at me to go for a drive.  For some reason she thinks that all I want to do on a Sunday is loaf on the sofa and watch sport!

After suggesting we go to Blenheim Palace only to be instantly rebuffed she started going on about a 'mystery drive'.

I took this to mean the New Forest because she's always gipping on about going there.  How right I was because as soon as we set of I was told to point the car in the direction of the M3.

Of course she knew the best route but I took her on a little west London tour.  We headed off through Chiswick, Brentford and Isleworth (free commentary of local landmarks included at no extra cost) which as it turned out (Sarah looked it up on Monday) was the best route.

Ninety miles, two hours and bleeding ears later we were in Beaulieu.  Actually, truth be told, apart from traffic on the way in to Lyndhurst, it was a smooth and stress free drive.

Shhhh, don't tell Sarah but I'm actually starting to enjoy the freedom of driving.

It's very convenient being able to hop into the car and head off straight away.  No waiting for buses, Tubes or trains although a tenner for the coach up to Brum for the Carling Cup match last night was too good an offer to turn down.  That latest awayday is a for a whole other post...for that read once I'm over the result!

We got to Beaulieu, parked up in the Motor Museum (thankfully we'd both been there and done that as kids), and map reader Bell took us on a tour of the area.  We took in the Beaulieu River, parish church, cricket green, and then headed into the woods (oh do behave!) for a roam amongst the trees, pheasants and deer.

We watched a helicopter whiz off from a field but the find of the day was a restored number 11 London bus taking day trippers around the sights.  Looking at the destination board made this sad W12er smile, Shepherd's Bush is everywhere.  In fact today more than ever with the Bush trending on Twitter because of a Hitler lookalike on a W12 bus.

After a couple of hours roaming we headed to Monty's Brasserie but they had stopped serving food so it was just a Guinness for me and a Coke for Sarah because she was driving the return leg.  The co-joined Montagu Arms Hotel certainly caught our eye, especially the Michelin Star restaurant.  Something tells me that we'll be having dinner there sooner rather than later!

My next cross country car jaunt is to Market Harborough in a couple of weekends time for a bit of a Uni meet-up.  Sadly for you readers (are there any?!?) I'll be making the trip alone so there won't be any gipping to tell of.  Don't worry though the weekend after Sarah and I are back on the road together and there is bound to be something to tell!

For now it's cheerio.  There's a pile of post-dinner washing up that needs to be done before I'm allowed a brew.  I think I need a union!